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Friday, February 25, 2011

Charlie Sheen Rant = Two and a Half Men Canceled for the Season

The abrupt end to the current season of "Two and a Half Men" isn't the only thing to come out of Charlie Sheen's troubles.
"Men" creator Chuck Lorre has decided to ditch the signature vanity cards that appear at the end of each episode of his series, including "Mike & Molly" and "The Big Bang Theory."
After Monday's "M&M" episode, a card appeared with Lorre's farewell message.
"It was more fun writing these things when I was fairly certain no one was reading them. That is no longer the case," he began.
"These days it seems like every vanity card is getting scrutinized and criticized by network executives, corporate legal departments and publicity departments, TV journalists and tabloid bloggers," he continued. "Believe it or not, my musings have been both cheered and jeered by TV Guide! But lately it's gotten out of hand. Which is why I've decided to take a break for a few weeks. Let things cool off a little."
Displaying his trademark sense of humor, Lorre unveiled his new plan.
"Instead of writing short essays that upset people, I've decided to use my one second of network TV to do something simple and hassle-free. Starting with this card, I'm going to display a photograph of a part of my body that is entirely innocuous," he wrote. "No longer will I share some troublesome piece of my mind. Now I will share an actual piece of Chuck that is incapable of offending anyone."
"You know, a foot, a hand, or maybe a toe. So with that in mind, behold..." he said as a picture of his elbow appearing on screen.
The same message played Thursday night after "The Big Bang Theory" along with a picture of Lorre's knuckle.
The decision comes after he used a vanity card after "Men" last week to reference Sheen's plight.
"I exercise regularly. I eat moderate amounts of healthy food. I make sure to get plenty of rest. I see my doctor once a year and my dentist twice a year. I floss every night," he wrote. "I've had chest x-rays, cardio stress tests, EKG's and colonoscopies. I see a psychologist and have a variety of hobbies to reduce stress. I don't drink. I don't smoke. I don't do drugs. I don't have crazy, reckless sex with strangers."
"If Charlie Sheen outlives me," he concluded. "I'm gonna be really pissed."
The next day, Sheen had a message of his own for Lorre, which he delivered via a paparazzo with a video camera in a parking garage.
"Chuck, I will outlive you," Sheen said. "I miss you, man. I'm looking forward to getting back to work. Get off those other shows. Get back to the one that launched those."
CBS and Warner Bros. announced Thursday they were shutting down "Men" for the rest of the season due to the "totality of Charlie Sheen's statements, conduct and condition."
Sheen has spent much of Thursday and Friday slamming Lorre and the decision to shut down production. He has even vowed to return to the set on Tuesday as originally scheduled, though it's most likely he'll find no one there if he does.
The actor, like the crew, won't be paid for the episodes that aren't being produced. And, contrary to his claims that HBO offered him a 10-episode series called "Sheen's Corner" – with a paycheck of $5 million per episode – a rep for the network has said no such project is in the works or offered.


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